Diet & Weight Loss Articles: The Importance of Forgiveness - Even When You Slip and Eat Chocolate

Are there times and places that are so stressful that you just can't keep your hand out of the cookie jar? Do you kick yourself later, (or even as you're munching)? It happens to us all, but it doesn't have to be the death of your diet.

As I said earlier, I attended a three-day conference this week. It was all about teamwork, and "being here now" and other feel-good values intended to improve productivity and morale in the corporation I work for.

I wouldn't have gone if it hadn't been mandatory. I'm just not comfortable in a room full of strangers, and I'm really not comfortable speaking spontaneously in front of a crowd. You can say that I was a bit stressed.

The conference lasted three days, and always began with a continental breakfast. Snacks and pastries stayed on the tables for us to graze on during frequent breaks, and we were treated with lunch each day in the conference center's nice banquet rooms - with desert, of course..

I wrote a book about sugar addiction, but I still found myself eating one sugary scone or pastry every day. The stress of milling around in a crowd and trying to make a decent impression on my boss, who also attended, proved too much for me. I slipped.

The conference gave me a perfect opportunity to practice one of the most important principals in my book Weight Loss: How to Keep Your Commitment.

Forgiveness.

More specifically - self-forgiveness. Letting it go. Refusing to allow guilt to drag you into believing that "this is the end - now I'm back on that slippery slope and I'll regain all 35 pounds by Christmas."

Another important principal is to celebrate every success, no matter how small. That gives you an opportunity to pre-empt any potential guilt thoughts. For instance, I only ate one pastry. None would be much better, but one is better than two.

I could also celebrate the fact that I didn't drink any of the coffee, even though I really wanted to. I had salads for lunch. Those are things I had a right to be proud of.

Celebrating success builds confidence and brings you closer to your goals. Feeling guilty can stop you in your tracks. We only have so much energy in any given day, so we need to spend it on the kinds of things that can bring us closer to our goals.

I have never known anyone who lost weight because she felt guilty, but I've known a lot of women who gain weight because feeling guilty makes them so depressed - which brings on the munchies.

Yes, I gained a few pounds. But it's gone already, because I didn't wallow in guilt for my transgressions. I came home, went back on the plan., and now everything's just fine.

Why do we feel guilty when we fall off our diets? That's an easy question to answer - we make promises to the one person who is least likely to forgive us if we can't follow through on our commitment.

Who judges us most harshly? Who points out every mistake we make, often before we even make them? Who knows everything we do? Who can we never hide from? Ourselves, right?

Have you ever let yourself down and then agonized over it for days? Have you ever made a small mistake and then labeled yourself a loser - almost automatically?

If I had told myself that I was a loser because of those pastries, wouldn't I be far more likely to buy a dozen donuts the next time I went to the store? Or maybe eat a whole box chocolates to make myself feel better after all that emotional pounding...

The art of self-forgiveness actually comes by practicing some of the things they were teaching at the seminar - keep your attention focused on the here-and-now instead of on the past; look for the positives instead of the negatives; notice your moods, and how they affect the way you feel and think; work through the fear of failure.

Success with weight loss comes from the same traits that any other successful venture requires. One of those important traits is the willingness to laugh at yourself. Another is the ability to pick yourself up off the ground if you trip, and start over.

I wish you the very best of health,

PS.

Is your addiction to sugar making you fat? Read Weight Loss: How to Keep Your Commitment, and learn simple mental exercises that let you rise above your cravings.

PPS.

How long has it been since you've been really exciting about losing weight? One way to get the motivation back is to do something that's really fun, makes an almost immediate difference, and actually helps you burn fat even while you're watching TV. What could do all that? Read weight lifting program for absolute beginners.

PPPS.

Too pooped to fuss with complicated meal plans? Tired of spending extra money for diet food that gives you smaller portions and less taste? Read The Easy-Does-It Diet, a simple plan for preparing your own make-it-ahead meals that taste better and give you more nutrition than the national brands. Why not make it Easy-Does-It?

@2003 Jonni Good
http://www.stress-free-weight-loss.com